Sunday, February 22, 2009

Things I've lost.

Lately the weekends are a source of discomfort for me. While I am happy to not be at school or work, when the end of Saturday rolls around I feel an emptiness at not having done anything productive. By the end of Sunday I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin.
It's not that I wish I was at school or work. I don't think I've EVER wished I was at work. It's just I can't spend an entire day doing nothing anymore.
When did I lose that? I used to be profoundly good at doing nothing. Weeks would disappear with nothing of note going on in my life, and I felt fine.
I think part of it is I am finally shaking off ever present teenage fatigue. When I was a teenager I could always sleep. Any time of day or night, any where. I frequently curled up into a ball on the floor of the drama room to take a quick 10 minute nap. I was the exact opposite of indefatigable. I could not be unfatigued. but now...
If I take a nap during the day I have a hard time getting to sleep at night.
So what am I supposed to do with my free time?

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